Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Carter's Birth Story

I'm so excited to finally have Carter's Birth story written down! And what better day to post it then on the exact day 2 years later when I was told that I had miscarried my baby. To the day! (July 1st) How awesome to remember such a hard time in my life with such a happy one now! 

I'm going to start off by saying that this pregnancy was the easiest by far or at least the quickest! It may have had to do with the fact that I was so distracted by 2 boys running a muck and me running after them on a daily basis to keep up with them not allowing a chance to really focus on being pregnant as much as I had with the other 2. Don't get me wrong I didn't mind it at all but it sure made the birth feel like it was super premature! In reality Carter only came nearly 3 weeks early. Not horrible. On the other side of the spectrum however, I was starting to get anxious and impatient for Mr. Man to make his entrance into this world. So when he did come early I was pretty darn relieved and excited! 

2 or so weeks before Carter's birth date came both Jason and I were getting anxious for Carter to come. We wanted to meet him so badly. The boys took the cake for being the most impatient however, with daily inquires on if he was coming yet. They probably fueled most of our impatience since we didn't want to hear their same pestering questions to be brutally honest. Although I was so happy that they were so excited to meet their brother. Just got a bit annoying after so long. Lol.  Although we were anxious we needed him to come after June 17th since Jason was still in training and if he missed any days before the 17th he would have to start training all over again, getting him behind in his team and putting off his chance to move up in the company faster. We were willing to wait until after then and since my due date wasn't until June 26th, we were pretty certain nothing would happen until after then anyway since my body doesn't go into labor by itself, at least not quickly or early by any means. We did set an induction date for June 20th since Jason's sister Becky was coming up that week and I wanted her to come to Carter's birth. I also had a friend coming up that same week that could be our Birth photographer since I had to cancel the one I had contacted months before since she didn't fit in the budget with everything else we needed before his arrival. Not to mention the 20th was my birthday and what better way to celebrate it then having a baby on the exact day! We thought we were in a great place, thinking that either way we were set to have him after the 17th. That is until I started dilating and effacing. At 36 weeks I was already 3cm dilated and 50% effaced. This came as a huge shock to both Jason and I when my OB checked me at my appointment since again my body doesn't go into labor on its own especially that early! My OB then told us that she is fairly certain that I would not make it to my due date, or 39 weeks in general. Her prediction was that I would give birth at 38 weeks if not sooner and he would be just about 6 pounds and will practically fly out without  a long labor at all. Talk about terrifyingly exciting! Exciting since any pregnant girl does not actually want to be pregnant the full length once the blubber whale sensation strikes. Terrifying since she made it sound like if I sneezed just right I would drop him in the isle at the grocery store without warning... Haha. This news made us a bit nervous since we needed him to come after the 17th. Her prediction put me just at 38 weeks if that! We realized we may be cutting it extremely close!! We left the appointment with our fingers crossed that he would stay put. Secretly however I was ecstatic that my body was starting to progress into labor by itself since after being induced for my 2 boys I always wanted to experience the excitement around my water breaking. It was just something that I had always imagined being a smoother and more natural transition into labor then that pitocin creates. I mostly just wanted the exciting trip to the hospital when it broke. Call me silly but I was really hoping I could experience that at least once.  I didn't think I ever would experience that since my placentas die early making me have to be induced to ensure a healthy baby at birth. 

From the sounds of it my OB couldn't see any signs of my placenta dying with this pregnancy even with all the stress tests I was scheduled for to double check on its condition. The results were shaky at the beginning of each test but always picked up near the end. This was something I was use to seeing with the other boys as well. The nurses just tagged it to Carter not wanting to cooperate fully. The concern that came at the beginning of each test had me and Jason on edge slightly since given my history, I literally could be taken into labor and delivery at the drop of a hat regarding the results. But the results ultimately came back normal each time, allowing us to go home with no concern from the doctors each time. 

It was 3:56am on June 10th when I woke up from a dream I had. In my dream I had just given birth and the boys, Jason and I were all cooing over our sweet little Carter. He had dark brown hair and was as sweet as could be! It felt SO real I had to lay there for a second to just think about it. It almost felt like someone was telling me to mentally "prepare". This was not the only dream I have had of Carter with dark hair and a realistic feel to it or a sensation to prepare early emotionally to welcome in this sweet baby boy. A couple of week prior Jason and I were winding down for the night watching a show and chatting about our short future ahead of us. There came a sense of understanding to my mind and heart that Carter would be coming early. I even told Jason how I just felt he was coming earlier than expected. This was before the OB had told us of her prediction. After laying there at 3:56am on the 10th thinking about how much more real this dream was compared to the last, I realized that I had to pee, again... Something that was a frequent occurrence being 37 weeks along. I came back and laid down again, more groggy and really looking forward to fall fast asleep again. I had just adjusted my big belly in an 11 point turn all while huffing and puffing. I had just closed my eyes in happy anticipation of getting more sleep when it happened without warning. My eyes flew open!! Carter kicked or head butted really really low. It was alarmingly low. I waited to see if he would do it again. He did. Then it happened, My water broke. I couldn't believe it, literally! I laid there to make sure I wasn't imagining it. I moved around a bit, shifting sides and at that point I knew without a doubt my water broke. I grabbed my phone to check the time, it was 4:00am on the dot. I didn't know what to do! It was 4am!! My kids and hubby were all happily sleeping and I didn't want to HAVE to actually call my previously set up babysitter this early even though she said she would have her phone on and by her head each night just in case. I was estactic and had a little celebratory squeal to myself once reality really set in that I was experiencing what I have always wanted to experience!! For a brief moment I didn't want to wake anyone up just yet and wait it out until my contractions had gotten stronger and closer together. That idea quickly faded when my OBs voice popped into my head that my labor would be very short and he would fly out. I literally didn't know how short it would actually be and did not want to chance it only to give birth in the car rushing to the hospital. That's when I turned and only slightly tapped Jason's shoulder whispering "Hubbin?" He jumped a mile high saying "Is it time!!!??" I took a second to stop laughing and then said enthusiastically "yes! My water just broke." He said "are you serious!!?" He then flew out of bed half asleep and started tearing through the house gathering up my hospital bag, the boys sleepover bag for the babysitter as well as getting dressed and getting the boys out of bed. That had to be my favorite thing to watch ever! You would have assumed by watching him that this was our first baby! Haha!!

 I was not moving nearly as fast since I did not want to gush fluids all over the place (TMI?). I made it to the bathroom to really double check the fluids. It was once again undeniable, my water was broken. Shortly after that the contractions started up. I went and got dressed. Jason was rushing me since he and the boys were all ready to go and he for sure did not want to have to catch a baby in the front seat! Keep in mind it was only 4:05am at this point. When I say he rushed through the house I wasn't kidding... Haha!! I went back to the bathroom again since more fluid was coming and I hadn't bought any pads to wear. We did buy puppy potty training mats for the car just in case I actually did go into labor naturally, but those were way to huge to put in my underwear. Luckily Carter's head was low enough to block the gushing and fluids running down my leg. I went around the house to make sure we got everything for both parties. It was so nice to have had everything packed a couple of weeks beforehand so in that frantic moment we could just grab and go! I gave myself a good pat on the back for that one. 

Once we got to the door ready to go (mind you its only 4:10am at this point) I recorded the boys reaction to us telling them that it was finally time for Carter to come! They were way excited! We made it out the door and I made the call to the on call babysitter. She answered right away and welcomed the boys in with welcome arms! What a relief we had planned ahead on that aspect! Few!! Thank you Tiffany for being AMAZING!! After the boys were situated, off Jason and I went/zoomed to the hospital! Oh the excitement was unreal! So much more fun then an induction date! I had to tell Jason to slow down. We didn't need a ticket on our way to the hospital I wasn't crowning yet or anything. He was just so excited but scared that Carter would come in the car. I reminded him that my contractions were only just starting and there was no need to speed. He slowed down and that's when he really started to get a grip on reality. We both kept saying "We're having a baby, today!! Holy cow is this really happening?" The ride to the hospital was so much fun and so bonding for us! I wish I could relive it over and over again. That was exactly what I had anticipated experiencing once my water broke. And having it happen in the early hours made it all that more fun! There was no traffic and the weather was beautiful! 

Once we got to the hospital around 4:40am (we choose a super nice hospital nearly 30mins away) We were getting all checked in and waiting on a room when Carter moved his head just right and the flood gates opened. Jason laughed at my now very wet wattle to our room. I laughed as well since I did ask to experience it all! It felt so good to get into a hospital gown and into a clean hospital bed. They put all the monitors on baby and me and put my IVs in. I was then checked to see how far along my progression was and I was already 5cm and 80% effaced! WOW! No kidding on the short labor comment! Once I get to a 5 I usually go pretty fast after that. 

 Once all the nurses routines were finished they let us be alone until the next routine check. Those few minutes were another really exciting time for both Jason and me. We discussed how smoothly so far this whole pregnancy and birth had been. How blessed we felt for everything that day in particular to have been going so flawlessly so far. We discussed how excited the boys would be to finally meet their baby brother and we loved the fact that we were there by ourselves. We also laughed and rolled our eyes to the fact that Carter had not waited to come after June 17th which meant Jason would have to start his training all over again. Stinker!

 I would have loved to have had Jason's sister there since I have had a family member attend each birth, but once we were in the hospital alone together I was so at peace knowing that this would be a really special experience for us both to go through alone together. I still had a tinge of sadness though since everyone needs a mother figure at their birth. I knew I had made the right choice in cutting my entire family out but I still missed having my mom there. It was in that moment that my Grandma Fern appeared by my bedside. My grandma passed away 12 years ago almost to the day. I knew she was there with us in that moment because her thin, soft wrinkled hand slid into mine. Slightly shaking like it use to when she would grab your hand as she sat and talked with you. It was warm and comforting. I started to cry in such gratitude thanking Heavenly Father for sending her to me in that exciting time. For the rest of the labor and delivery I could feel and see her presence sitting on the edge of the couch the hospital provides for husbands and other family members. She was in one of her favorite outfits, she had her legs crossed and her foot was slightly bouncing in anticipation. She was leaning over slightly on the cabinets that were against the couch to support her frail body. Her hair was short and the same dark grey color that was attempted to be covered with a lighter dirty blonde color. She sat smiling with her eyebrows slightly raised as she always smiled. She was there to support her granddaughter and to also be there for Carter on his big day since I know he had a very special bond with her. Moments after I felt her with us we had a new nurse come in for the start of her shift. She was an older frail women who resembled my grandma in the physical form. She would lift my arm to check my stats, her hands were soft and slightly wrinkled, and would ever so slightly shake. She had short dark grey hair, she has a sweet smile and a quiet voice as my grandma had. I thought it was such a blessing knowing that she would be my nurse during the actual delivery. The tears started flowing once again in happiness when I noticed her wrist watch. It was the exact one my grandma use to wear every day. It was a small thing but it made it feel even more like my grandma was in the room with us. What a sweet experience it all was for me. Even Jason who never met Grandma Fern could feel her sweet spirit in the room. We took a picture with this sweet nurse after Carter was born. Even though she didn't fully look like my grandma she was definitely sent as a surgent for her.  

Things were still progressing during the early hours of the morning, I progressed to a 6 and stayed there for awhile. Jason and I tried to find a show to watch to distract my mind from the now more intense contractions. Even though the contractions were getting harder to breathe through I realized during one that I was breathing through they were no where near as fatally intense or long lasting in comparison with contractions induced with pitocin. Holy crap they were night and day different!! I thought to myself if i really wanted to or needed to go full natural on this birth I think I actually could! The pain difference was insanely different! If I can avoid getting induced ever again, I would do what ever it takes! 

I didn't go fully natural this go around however since I'm a wimp when it comes to pain tolerance. I told the nurse to get me an epidural early so that I could just enjoy the sweet moment of his arrival. I LOVE my epidurals. I got it around 6cm dilated and just really loved life after that. 

It took an hour or 2 to dilate to a 7. Only 5 minutes after my nurse checked me and said I was a 7 I felt a lot of pressure  in my pelvis. I knew that feeling all to well but thought to myself I'm only a 7, he can not possibly be crowing now!? I called my nurse in and told her what's going on. She checked me and to her surprise I was a full 10cm and he was sure enough crowning!! 

I was warned right as I was settled into my bed that my OB was scheduled for a few surgeries that day so she may not be there at the birth but that one of her CO-obstetricians of the office would be. I wasn't concerned with that, I didn't care who caught the baby as long as he came healthy. Once the nurse saw that I was crowning she made the call to my OB to see if she was available. She came back laughing. She said "you won't believe this , Dr. Evenson was just washing up for her next surgery and said that she would put if off to make it to your birth as long as you push like a champ" We both laughed, what are the odds that I flew to a 10 within minutes just in time to still allow my OB who I love to be the one to deliver Carter!? Just another thing that went flawlessly during this birth. Heavenly Father rocks. 

Dr. Evenson was there within seconds. She got her gloves on and check to see where Carter was. She was surprised that it was already time for me to push. They got me ready and she then told me to push. I pushed 3 times then took a small break to wait for the next contraction. I then pushed 2 more times and that's all it took! Carter Timothy Miller was born at 10:35am! He was 5lbs 15oz and 20inchs long with dark brown hair just like my dreams had indicated. We were so in love with him! Dr. Evenson was laughing as she was cleaning him up before she handed him to me since his arms and legs were going everywhere. She laughed and said "look at those hands and feet!! And man he is just all arms and legs!" Haha definitely a Miller boy!! They then put him on my chest which was so amazing! He calmed right down and his breathing regulated. The hospital allows moms to hold their new babies for an hour skin to skin uninterrupted to ensure bonding. I didn't get a chance to do that with Christian since he wasn't breathing right and doctors needed to help him. Kaden I got to do it with and loved it. I was excited to have the chance to experience it again. It really is so bonding for mom and baby! Before Dr. Evenson ran off to her scheduled surgery, she congratulated us and told us that I was right, my placentas do retire early, she started seeing the signs that it was on its way out and thats why I went into labor so early but our cute little boy there detected it and decided to come early and naturally for his mama. Yay for Carter for answering his mama's prayers to go into labor naturally!!

After a few minutes of him on my chest my friend Ashlee came into the room. She was trying to make it to the birth but I progressed too fast. I was just so happy she could come and celebrate with us moments after he was born. After our hour of skin to skin was up, our nurse took Carter to get wrapped up and warm and then it was Jason's turn to hold Carter for the first time. I looked over and caught one of my favorite moments after our babies are born, my handsome husband carefully cradling our new baby and talking so sweetly to him with tears in his eyes. I sent Ashlee over to get a picture of him. It is just the sweetest thing for me to experience him becoming a dad time and time again. Best daddy ever!

Once Jason's time was done it was aunt Ashlee's turn. She was in love! I felt so lucky to have such a great friend there for me! She literally dropped everything to be there for us. 

We were then taken to our recovery room. I finally got to eat something and it was amazing! We sat and talked as we ate while cuddling a cute baby. Once Ashlee went home Jason and I watched some shows while I was getting adjusted to nursing again. It was such a chill night that night even with all the nurses in and out. The entire day from start to finish was such a breeze and truly one of the happiest days of our lives! Everything went so smoothly and with ease. We felt Heavenly Fathers hand throughout the entire day helping things progress flawlessly. We witnessed multiple blessings throughout the day. We surly were so blessed. Even though we had such an amazing day from start to finish there had been so many blessings we experienced the days leading up to his birth and days prior. One major blessing I would love to share is that just a couple of weeks before we gave birth we put our house we still owned in Arizona up for sale. Within hours we had 3 offers on the house all over our asking price. Literally days before we gave birth we signed the last document stating that we had officially sold our house. If that wasn't a blessing in and of itself to get rid of the major responsibility that house still had on our shoulders financially, the amount of money we made off of the house made our jaws drop. We were just hoping to just break even on the house and to rid ourselves from the ridiculous monthly payment the HOA demanded from us, but instead we made $10,000 off the house. The day after Carter's birth that money was available in our bank account. We left the hospital knowing that his birth could be paid off in full right away and still have plenty to help us financially the months following. Does that not just have Heavenly Fathers name written all over it!? Not only did that money come in but Jason was also given a bonus, and a raise!!. All these blessings were so humbling to experience and I know without a doubt that they came to us days before Carter was born BECAUSE we were doing the Lords will making sacrifices and bringing another beautiful spirit child into this world. We felt so blessed and so incredibly happy while in the hospital with our new little guy. Truly one of the best experiences ever! Carter's birth is for sure one for the books!